6 Months
by ImaginaryPoet
Summary: Semi-sequel to "All Again for You".  Calzona, dealing with the next few months after the shooting, talk about the past, present, and future.
1. Chapter 1

6 Months

XxSoNFanxX  
I don't own anything.

Review if you want, it generally makes me feel nice.

Calzona

Set after "All Again for You", Callie and Arizona are getting back into the swing of things.

Hello everyone! I got some really great reviews on my last Calzona fic. I had some free time this weekend and decided that I'd try writing a semi-sequel. It's set after "All Again for You", but I'm not sure where it'll go fro there.

Arizona POV

I stared at the piece of paper in my hand for a long minute before I got up from the couch and walked across the apartment, into the kitchen, where coffee had patiently waited for me. I poured a big mug before downing it, almost instantly. I hadn't realized how tired I had been these last few weeks. The shooting, the aftermath, visiting mine and Callie's parents; all of it had really taken a toll on me. I placed my mug in the sink and just stood there for a minute. I was slightly startled when I felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around me, but I quickly relaxed, knowing it was my Calliope.

"You're not ready yet?" she asked with concern.

"No, it's been difficult to get going this morning," I revealed.

She turned me around so that we were face-to-face. She swept some hair out of my eyes and noticed the frown on my face. She lifted my chin with one hand, taking my hand in her other. Looking into my eyes, she smiled, and then she kissed me.

"I know that it sucks," she said, "but if you miss your appointment with Dr. Perkins, you can't get cleared for surgery as quickly. Sitting around doing paperwork hasn't been very much fun for you."

"I know. I just…what if I don't want to some stranger about my life or my feelings? This should really be optional."

"Arizona," she said with slight disappointment in her voice, "they want to make sure we're alright."

"I'm alright, Calliope."

"I know that you think so, but after what happened, they want to take every precaution."

"I guess they figure that Gary Clarke thought that he was alright after his wife's death, right? Now they don't want to risk having a bunch of surgeons going crazy."

"That would probably put us a little further down than number 12."

I laughed, then said, "Calliope, can't you be serious for an entire conversation?"

"Sure," she responded, "this will be good for you, for all of us."

"You really think so?"

"Yeah, I do. And if you don't need his help, you'll only have to go a few times."

"That's true. I hope it doesn't feel like a waste of time though."

"It might be," she started, a smirk growing on her face.

"What?" I asked.

"If you get nothing else out of it…" her smirk still growing.

"What Calliope?"

"I heard that Dr. Perkins is REALLY cute!"

"Calliope!"

We laughed together for a while longer. She really did know just how to put me at ease. When the clock warned that I only had an hour left to get ready, I got up and headed for the bedroom. She reached out her arm and pulled me in for a minute.

"Arizona," she said, "I know you'll be just fine." She kissed me on the head.

"Calliope," I said, "no matter how cute this doctor is, I promise you'll be the only doctor on my mind," I teased.

"Oh? That's a relief. I was really worried that Andrew Perkins was going to steal your heart from me," she joked.

"That is one thing you'll never have to worry about," I said.

"You and guys? I wasn't really worried."

"Me and anyone but you."

We kissed again and I went to get ready. This was my only way back into the OR, so, like it or not, I had to bring out my best.

Whoot! Chapter one down!

Random fact: I take most of my titles from songs. Interesting? No? Ok, sorry, I'll stick to the story…


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

You should review. The lack of reviews makes me sad. Sadness makes me not want to write. Then you are left with nothing. And that's just sad.

"So you mean to tell me that while all of this is going on, you are prepping for unanesthetized surgery on a child, with your exgirlfriend?"

"Basically."

Andrew Perkins was not the man I believed him to be. I had pictured an older man, grey hair, tweed jacket, with some kind of facial hair grown only to make other people believe he had wisdom to which us regular people could not compare. Instead, he was a man only a little older than me. He dressed like a businessman, but kept a relaxed appearance. His beard was not that of a Civil War General, but more like Derek Sheppard when he had gone a day or so without shaving. Callie had gotten her information straight; for a guy, he was very handsome.

I wasn't excited to speak with him at first, as I had imagined that he would want to pick me apart and judge me for feeling, only what I could assume, feelings that the other surgeons didn't have. I'm not like the rest of them. Usually, I think of it as a positive. I understand my patients because I can relate to them emotionally, but in a lot of ways, it makes me seem immature and childish. After we went over the basics though, things just started to pour out of my mouth. I found it easier to speak with him than I had imagined. It was like addressing Mark or Karev, it wasn't abnormal, and at least he had never slept with my girlfriend.

"How did you feel when you were doing this?"

"I was terrified," I revealed, "I didn't want my patient to know anything was wrong, but it was so hard to hide. On top of the stress of not having my Peds scrub nurses, or an OR, or the proper surgical tools, I was in the scariest situation possible with the love of my life, who at that time, wanted absolutely nothing to do with me."

"What happened next?"

I was fine until this part. When the police asked me this question, I had to stop and collect my breath. Telling them the details made my stomach sore, and I wanted to be anywhere but there. I played the scene over and over again in my head. It was my greatest moment of strength, and also, my greatest moment of weakness. It was the scariest experience of my life.

"We, um, we gave her a local anesthetic, so at least she couldn't feel the scalpel. I was so worried about trying to calm her down, and Calliope was so good with her. I thought that, maybe I was wrong. Seeing her with Ruby made me think that maybe having kids with her wouldn't have been so bad after all. I couldn't stop watching her. That's an issue for me. I can't bear to stop watching her, incase she does something amazing and I miss it."

I snapped out of my Calliope induced daydream and regained composure before speaking again,

"I saw her eyes change emotions. She went from absolute love to absolute fear. I turned around, to see what she was looking at, and I saw him. He had a gun, and he kept saying that SWAT had shot him, like he couldn't believe it. I couldn't breathe. Something came over me, an urge I had never felt before. I told him that there were only children on the floor, and I covered Ruby with my body. I was so scared. I had no idea what to do. I knew that if nobody did anything, someone else was going to get shot. That's when she-"

This part was the worse. In my nightmares, it always ends the way I saw it in my head as it was happening. I swore I'd never get to see her smile again, look into her eyes, or tell her that I was wrong and that I loved her. As I was huddled over the scared little girl, I pictured him ending her life. After hers, after she screamed out in pain, I would turn around, just in time to see the bullet meant for me.

"Arizona," he broke me from my thoughts, "have a tissue."

I hadn't noticed that I was crying. My thoughts played out as if I was back in that room, the alternate ending of the horrific day becoming a reality.

"What did Calliope do when Mr. Clark came into the room?"

"She got up. She walked over to him and asked his name, what was wrong. When he said SWAT shot him, she gave him bandages and asked him to go. I thought that… I thought I would never get to speak to her again, and I wanted to die, just so I wouldn't have to live on the earth without her. I felt terrible and helpless. I wondered, as I was shaking and crying, if that was how my brother felt, right before he died."

He writes something down and urges me to continue.

"I told her that I didn't trust that she loved me, and she turns around and puts herself between a gunman and me. She was willing to die protecting me, because she loved me, after I told her she didn't show it. I felt like the biggest bitch in the whole world. Then when he left, and she slammed the door, I couldn't help but cry, more than I had been. I was scared, yes, but how could I let the love of my life risk her life for mine, and not cry. She was for real. I was the mystery. I got that, finally."

"What about the girl?"

"She was so scared, poor thing. She wanted her mommy and I couldn't blame her, I wanted mine too. I was a mess; I didn't know what to do to ease her pain. Calliope was a champ. She told her not to worry because I was the best doctor in the world, and I would take good care of her. At the same time, she was reassuring me, and making sure I was ok to do the procedure. I know I wouldn't have made it without her."

"Wow," he said, "it sounds like Calliope really helped you set some things straight."

"Yes. She's incredible."

"So, is it safe to assume that the two of you have worked things out?"

"For the most part. We don't have everything figured out, but we know that we want to be together. That's a lot better than most, I'd say."

"So would I," he smiles warmly, "Dr. Robbins, our time is nearly up, but we have a few more things to discuss."

"Am I ready for surgery?"

"Well, that's part of it. I'm going to go ahead and clear you for surgery under two conditions. First, you need to come back here for weekly check-ups, that's standard for all of the surgeons. That's only for the time being."

"What's the second?" I can't imagine what else there could be.

"Keep working things out with Calliope. You seem really great together."

"Thanks, Dr. Perkins," I say as I stand to leave. Maybe this whole thing wouldn't be as bad as I thought.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Hey everyone! The reviews from chapter 2 certainly made me smile! I've been sort of busy with exams lately, but now that I'm past midterm, I should have some more time to write. MORE REVIEWS! Reviews tell me that the story is being read and is therefore worth writing. Plus, they make me super excited…SUPER.

xxx

Callie's POV

Once Arizona left for her appointment with Dr. Perkins, I began to get ready for my own. I understood where she was coming from in her hesitations. She doesn't like people to see beneath her dimpled smile and shining blue eyes. She'd like the world to think that she was perfectly fine no matter what; shootings and chaos be damned. She likes her secrets, her closed off emotions that she'll never let out.

Sometimes, usually while she's asleep, I'll watch her. I love to watch her breathe peacefully and not have to pretend to be anything but what she is. I love those nights, because they mean she's really happy. She could be anywhere in the world, doing anything she could dream of, but she's perfectly happy just lying next to me. I think that she can tell I'm watching her, but I don't mind. A part of me wants her to know, just in case she ever doubts what I feel for her again. Nobody could spend hours upon hours staring at someone that was anything less than the one.

I'm not talking about proposing or anything like that. we'll have the rest of our lives to worry about marriage. I'm talking about just being. I know that I could spend the rest of my life with her, even just watching her sleep, and I would be completely satisfied with my life. Sure, maybe I'd miss surgery and breaking bones. It's pretty badass. I realized through this whole ordeal, I'd give it all up just to be with her. There's nothing that makes an awesome surgery more awesome than coming home to her.

Some nights are less fortunate than the peaceful ones though. I was used to the nightmares about the tiny coffins. She never said anything about them, but I could always hear her talking as she thrashed around and cried in her sleep. I used to be afraid of those nights. I learned that if I hold her, just right, she stops shaking and crying. I hated to see her in so much agony, until I realized that I got to see more of who she really was each time. The tiny coffins would never touch perky, bubbly Dr. Robbins, but they would devour insecure, guilty Arizona.

She would let it hit her every time she lost a patient. The only time she had ever let me see her cry had been on her birthday, after losing Wallace. I got to see the scared and upset part of her than no one gets to see, and it made me feel more for her, if only because I knew it meant she wanted me to know her on a deeper level. When she told me she was in love with me, I had never been so happy in my life. Finally, I didn't have to give myself away. I wasn't throwing myself out and hoping for her to catch me. I was getting another part of her, the part that I wanted in all of my past relationships. I knew then that everything before had been nothing short of a joke. I certainly didn't know that the joke was on me.

I hated letting her go, because I knew how much those special moments had made me feel. I hated the idea of living without her. I didn't know how to live before I met her. I wanted a baby. I needed a baby. That was my story. When I thought about it all of those nights alone in my bed, I realized the significance. I was the girl in high school who was going to trap her boyfriend with a baby. I didn't need the baby; I didn't even really want the baby. I just wanted someone who would never let me go.

George had been my first attempt at pettiness. I knew that we had rushed things and it was wrong for us to be together. I thought that a baby could make it okay. I'm still grateful that we couldn't conceive. I think it was fate. I wasn't meant to be with him, so I wasn't supposed to be tied to him. When our marriage dissolved, I was broken apart. I thought that Erica could fix me. When that didn't work out, I turned to Mark, who turned out to be a much better friend than lover. I realized, through his rocky relationship with Lexie, that you can't rely on others to fix you. You have to fix yourself. I made an attempt, and I felt defeated. Rome wasn't built in one day. I absolutely never expected to become a new person that night at Joe's.

I love me. It's arrogant and narcissistic, but really, it' not. It took a lot to learn how. She helps me every day, even though she doesn't know. It was her love that changed me and I know she's made me a better person. She is still making me a better person. It's not that she's changing me, but she makes me want to change myself. That's how I realized that the baby thing wasn't as important as I had made it all out to be. That moment that I saw Gary Clarke standing in the doorway with a gun, it was all very clear. I didn't want a baby, I wanted Arizona's baby. I didn't want to live a life without her in it. She made me a hero. She always makes me feel like a hero.

Getting back together was the best thing we've done. It didn't matter who was wrong or right or selfish or selfless. It didn't matter if I would really forgo the idea of having a big family or if she would decide to take back her offer of 10 kids. It didn't matter. All that mattered was that I was kissing the most important person in the world, and she was kissing me back. That moment was the very first moment in my life where I felt whole.

Since then, she's gotten better at telling me how she feels. She's even started telling me things about her brother. His favorite color growing up was Robin's Egg Blue, because it had their name in it. Information like that, as insignificant as it seems to others, is huge. I love when she lets me in because nobody else gets to know what I know. I'm special enough to know all of her secrets and she knows that I love each and every one of them.

I've definitely been more flexible too. I know she won't destroy my heart because she shows me how valuable she thinks it is. I can let my guard down and be myself and it's awesome. I think I'm happier now. I think I say things like "super" and "awesome" almost as much as "hardcore" and "badass". I can't believe I'm going to admit, but she's even got me listening to Taylor Swift. Yes, me, badass, hardcore, breaks bones professionally, Callie Torres. I pretend that it's torture to my ears, but I secretly love it, just because it always makes me think of my Arizona. The more I know her, the more I love her, even the parts that include listening to teenage pop/country.

I knew this much, undoubtedly. How was I supposed to explain it to a stranger, a stranger who had complete control over the future of my career? I knew I had to try, if not for myself, for her.

xxx

I get to my appointment early and wait for them to call my name. when they do, I get up and head into the office, still not sure what to expect.

"Dr. Torres, very nice to meet you," Dr. Perkins says with a smile.

"Likewise," I say, shaking his extended hand, "Please call me Callie."

"Ok, Callie it is. You can call me Andrew. Alright, Callie, let's talk," he says.

"Ok. Anything particular in mind?"

"Let's talk about you. "

"Alright," I say before I begin my nervous rant, "I'm Calliope, but nobody is allowed to call me that except for my parents, grandparents, my aunts and uncles I guess, possibly a few cousins, I don't-"

"Callie?" he interrupts.

"Hmm?"

"Are you nervous? Do you need some water?"

"No, no, I'm fine, I just don't do this often. I don't talk about my life to strangers. That's not me, at all. That's definitely more Arizona."

"Arizona?" he asks. His ears perked up at her name, meaning his playing dumb was only for my sake. Even if I didn't know she had been in his office only hours before, I knew he would know her anyway. She's famous in this hospital.

"Yeah, Dr. Robbins, that is."

"Are you good friends with Dr. Robbins, Arizona?" I know he wants me to talk about my feelings, but his prompting on this subject of which he is probably already informed is sort of freaking me out.

"Andrew, I think for honesty's sake, we should just get down to business. I know that you know that Arizona and I are a couple and you probably know that she woke up in my bed this morning. She wakes up there almost every morning. And I know that you know that she and I were trapped on the floor together during the shooting. I know this. You know this. This news is not new news, it is old news."

"Callie, slow down," he says, "I don't mean to pry. You're right, I do know you and Arizona are involved. It was one of the first things the nurses told me when I arrived here. They love their gossip. As for the rest, I know half of the story from the shooting. I don't know your half. Can you fill me in?"

I talk, rant, for most of the rest of the time. I talk about our relationship and our breakup and the baby thing and how we've made up and spend the last few months getting back on track.

"So, what do you think of where you are now?" he asks.

"I think that for the first time in a long time, if ever, I'm complete. There's nothing I want because I have everything I could have ever asked for."

"Have you completely given up on the baby issue?"

"Honestly?" I ask.

"I expect nothing less." He responds with a grin.

"I still think about us having a family someday. I still want that for us. Right now, I'm ok with just her. I know now that I want to spend my life right alongside her. If I can have that, it'll just be the icing on the cake. Actually, we are so awesome already, it'd be like the sprinkles. They're nice but not necessary."

Andrew laughs at my analogy and says, "Good for you. You seem to have a lot of things figured out."

"What about you?" I ask.

"Pardon?"

"Am I ready to go fix limbs or do you think I need some extra time to sit and do nothing?"

He laughs again and says, "I'll tell you what. You seem ready for surgery. I'll give you this to give to Chief Webber, and you'll be all set. You still have to come see me once a week, but that's the Chief's condition for all cleared surgeons, so don't worry about that. And, I think there's one other thing."

"One other thing?"

"I'd be lying if I said that I didn't think your relationship with Arizona is good for you. It's good for the both of you. I want you to keep working on it. I know what you're saying is meant with the best intentions, but all is easier said than done. For next week, I want you to make a list of five things you see in your future. Be as honest as possible."

"Then I'm good to go?"

"Then you're good to go."

"Easy," I say smiling. I get up to leave and he speaks again.

"Just wait Callie, we're just getting started," he says with a grin.

I'm not sure what he means by that, but right now I don't think that I care. Almost a month without a scalpel or a saw or a drill has made me crave surgery. I was cleared in one session. Today has been better than I expected and it's not even noon yet. Suck that Mark Sloan. Speaking of whom, I think I should go find him and tell him to send any bone injury he gets to me. I really can't wait to get back into an awesome surgery. That'd make today super. Yeah, that just freaked me out a little bit too. I told you I've changed.

xxx

Ok, tried to give you a long one since I haven't been on in a while. Hope you liked it. If you did, review! If you didn't, review! Happy Hump Day!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Thanks for all of the reviews! They're awesome, please keep them up!

I've been trying to keep the chapters longer to make up for my writing less often. Do you guys like them long or should I space them out more?

I'll be a little busier for a while, cause I'm working on registering for the spring, and moving away from my roommate. In a way, part of this chapter is for her, cause without her, the Becky story wouldn't exist.

.-.-.-.-.-.

Arizona POV

The time since my first visit had flown by. Cristina and Owen had gotten married, and Calliope and I worked on what was to become our apartment. Things were turning around and I was thrilled. My personal life was not the only thing to be happy about.

I had a fantastic week at work, despite coming back from such a horrific incident. I hated seeing my friends and coworkers so torn up over the event that had been no one's fault but the crazed gunman. Whatever they needed from me, I would be happy to oblige, especially if it meant everything would get back to the way it was. I still had hope in me that not all was lost.

One of my first patients since coming back was an adorable six-year-old girl named Felicity. She had been having sore throats too often, so it was up to me to take out her tonsils. I was happy that the surgery was an easy one, and that the patient wasn't dying. It was one of the few perks of being a PED's surgeon; helping a sick kid and knowing that they would go on to live an incredible life.

Felicity had struck a nerve with me the moment we had met. I introduced myself to Mr. and Mrs. Morales and was leaning down to introduce myself to my little patient, when I was taken aback. Felicity had wavy, dark hair and gorgeous, tan skin. When she and I locked eyes, brilliant blue met brilliant blue.

"Hi there, Felicity, I'm Dr. Robbins, I'm very happy to meet you."

The child grinned and deep dimples appeared, just as mine had moments before. I then explained the procedure to parents and child.

"Do you have any questions for me?"

"Will it hurt?" the little girl asked.

"Well," I started, "you'll be a little sore, but not much worse than you are now. When it's all done, you'll feel a whole lot better, and you can have as much ice cream as you want!"

"As much as I want?" the excited girl asked.

"Absolutely," I responded with a dimpled grin.

"This is going to be the best day ever!"

I laughed and said goodbye. As soon as I'd left the room, I let my mind take over. The shocked thoughts overtook the doctor thoughts, and I smiled at the irony. I couldn't quite see it before. I know I had agreed to the possibility of having children someday, but I didn't really see it. That was until I met Felicity. I had never seen a child with traits so similar to both Calliope's and mine before.

As I walked down the hallway, it all became a little clearer. I saw our big house, white picket fence around a huge yard. I could see a little girl with her dark hair in braided pigtails. I watched as she played on the swings, dirt covering her overalls. I could hear her laughing and smiling, dimples and blue, blue eyes, complementing her beautiful, olive features, as she urged her mother to push her higher. I could see Calliope doing just as she was told. And I stood there with the happiest smile plastered on my face, feeling happier than I had ever remembered feeling. She jumped off the swing when it was at the highest peak, making Calliope's face full of worry. Landing gracefully, she got up and ran to me, as I bent down with outstretched arms. I lifted her and we spun around, as if it had happened multiple times before. We both laughed as Calliope neared us so that she could be close, once again. It felt incredible. Calliope wrapped her arms around the pair of us as I heard,

"Arizona?"

"Hmm?" I had been drawn out of my daydream.

"Why are you standing in the middle of the hallway with a dreamy look on your face?" she asked while an amused half-smile began to form.

"I was just thinking," I said.

"About me?" she asked, laughing.

"Always," I said, as we walked together to the end of the hall.

..-..-..-..-..

"Hello, Andrew," I said as I sat.

"Hello, Arizona," he countered, "how has your week been?"

I told him all about my week and the surprising ease at which I returned to normal.

"And this patient…?" he asked, waiting for me to continue.

"She made me see something in myself that I don't think I was able to see before. I saw my future with Calliope. Before, I could see us in a big house with a white picket fence, dogs, and chickens, like I planned. I couldn't visualize the kids that I promised Calliope. I finally saw her. I couldn't believe how happy I was to see her."

"Her?"

"My daughter. Mine and Calliope's daughter."

He smiled and asked, "How does this make you feel?"

"I'm not sure. I was so happy. When I thought about the three of us, I was so happy. I never knew the idea could make me feel that way. I never knew you could fall in love with an idea."

"Have you told Calliope about her?"

"No," I guiltily responded, "I don't even know what I would say."

"Do you want to tell me about her?" he offered.

"She was beautiful. She was so beautiful. She looked just like Calliope, but with dimples and my father's eyes. She was playful and messy, just like me as a little kid. I could tell she was naughty and adventurous, like a little Calliope. I saw her and I knew. I knew that I wanted for her to be mine. I want that perfect little package of Calliope's and my best traits. I haven't ever felt this way before."

"Do you think this is all because you are in the process of moving in with Calliope?"

"I don't know. I think that finally, there's someone I would never mind seeing two of every day."

"Have you ever lived with anyone before?"

"Oh, God, no! Not since my first semester at college. Her name was Becky. She seemed nice and I didn't think she would be hard to live with at all. The first couple of weeks went all right, until she started to show her true colors. She would stay up all night, insisting that she needed all the lights on because she was busy doing homework. She said I didn't understand because her major was so much harder than mine. She was a Computer Science major and I was studying to be a doctor, I got it just fine. The only reason she was doing homework so late was because she spent all day, literally, all day watching television and playing video games. She wouldn't get up to go to class, though she always set her alarm to ring before I had to get up. Then, she'd let it ring, always pressing the snooze button, with no intention of ever getting up. When she wasn't keeping me from sleeping enough, she was disgusting me with her smelly food and bad personal hygiene. She showered once every few weeks and she left her dirty clothes all over the room. She also expelled gas, from both ends, with more force and vigor and manliness than I had ever experienced in my life. I grew up with a father and brothers, so that was a lot. My only happiness came on Friday night, when she would go home until Sunday night. As soon as her parents drove away, the rest of the floor opened their doors and we all hung out and had fun. I loved when she left because I could do whatever I wanted to. I couldn't do that when she was around. She didn't want me to put up my Cindy Crawford poster, she hated gay people, and she badmouthed the military constantly. My life with her was torture. I made it to the beginning of October before I asked to switch rooms, and that spring, I got a single and lived alone ever since."

"Sounds like you had quite the college experience," he said as he laughed.

"Oh yeah. I love people, but I hate the idea of sharing my space with anyone else. Calliope is the only person in the world that I don't feel limited living with. Maybe I feel like we're one person. All I know is, I can't sleep or eat or smile or love my life as much as I do when I'm with her. Had I a Calliope instead of Becky, I would have had an overall different sort of college story to share."

"Is that what you see?" he asked.

"What I see?"

"When you think about your future."

"I see myself," I said, "and Calliope," I smiled, "sitting on a couch, in our home's huge living room, holding each other and listening to the fire crackling. Just as we're about to have the perfect moment, squeals and shrieks and running children fly past us, followed by two big dogs, and..."

"And?"

"And Calliope tells the dogs to sit and be calm as the kids run around again, and we both manage to scoop one up. Then the four or five, I'm not even sure anymore how many of us there will be, of us sit there in the quiet until one of the little ones speaks, and Calliope sweetly answers in her best motherly way. Then the room goes back to quiet, all except for the fire, and our kids sleepily lay in our arms. Then we look at each other and at all of the things we are lucky enough to have, and we have our new perfect moment."


	5. Chapter 5

Hey everyone! As you may have guessed, I've been pretty busy getting ready for final exams and whatnot, and haven't been writing as frequently as I would like. I just finished some exams, and now my day is free. I thought I'd take a study break and give you all a little something. It's been a while, and a lot of stuff has gone down since last time. I'm not sure how I'm going to get at it yet, but I'll try my best to give you a good chapter!

Friday is my birthday, reviews would be fantastic!

-.-.

"So…"

"So…"

"I hope you've done your homework," he said with a grin.

"Oh," she began, "I rocked my homework…"

"_Mark!" she called across the hall._

"_Callie? What do you want, it's like, three in the morning!"_

"_I know, I just got off work. I need your help." She gave him her best pouty face._

"_Alright, Torres, what is it?"_

"_Perkins gave me homework."_

"_Homework?"_

"_Yes. He wants a list of five things I want in my future."_

"_What for? That seems a little nosy to me."_

"_I don't know," she said, "my subconscious probably needs to prioritize or something. I don't know, psych was never my thing!"_

"_You know what it could be? Perkins and Teddy probably want to know so Teddy can go tell her bff Arizona what's going on in your head. She's probably trying to figure out if you're going to make her give you those 10 kids!"_

"_OK, Mark," she sighed, "first of all, I'm going to ignore the fact that you said 'bff' because it freaks me out. Next, Andrew can't tell anybody anything that I say in therapy because he took an OATH. Also, that's devious, and Arizona wouldn't do that. She told me that she agreed to have kids if and when we were ready. I'm not in a hurry, and I know she won't go back on her word. Lastly, could you picture us with ten? Uh, no. Old woman living in a shoe? Not my thing."_

"_That'd be great," he said smiling, "your hair would turn completely grey by the time you were 40, Robbins would be way less smiley, both of you would want to spend more time with me, and I could probably teach the kiddos some pretty nasty tricks to play on their Good Ol' Moms."_

"_Exactly why that will never happen. Just help me with the list?"_

"_Fine, but those kids you do have?"_

"_Yeah?"_

"_I'm still going to teach them nasty tricks."_

Callie smiled as she pulled the list from the pocket of her scrub top. She had spent an hour listening to Mark spout stupidity about what she should put on the list. His number one was, "Sex everyday" or "Bacon everyday", both of which Callie could have if she really wanted. It was nights like those that made her seriously question what had to be wrong with her in order to have such a strange best friend.

"Ok, so I'm going to ask you to read me off your list, but instead of reading it as written, I want you to rank the list for me. Least important thing first, most important last."

"That kind of changes things," she admitted.

"How so?"

"What if I can't figure out what I want more than something else?"

"That's up to you. I will say, if you often have trouble choosing what's most important versus what's least important in your everyday life, this exercise should be very beneficial. Instead of looking at your list as a whole, look at the contents separately. Ask yourself if what you read is important, and then compare that importance to the next thing. If one is clearly more important, it'll help you rank them. Once you have an absolute top and bottom, the middle doesn't matter as much."

"I knew this had to be harder than it seemed," she tried to joke.

"It's not supposed to be easy Callie, but it will be beneficial."

She spent a few minutes rearranging the list in her head, until she had it rewritten perfectly.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Number five: Win a Harper Avery."

"Why is this number five? It's a pretty big goal," he asked.

"I want the Harper Avery," she said, "but I'm not willing to sacrifice the rest of the list to get it. If it happens, it'll be after the rest."

He smiled, sensing that she understood the lesson, "Four?"

"Number four: Become department head."

"Ok," he laughed, "why is this?"

"Well, department head gets to be in charge of the entire department. I'm an attending, a badass attending, and I know that I could run the department better than any other attending in this building. Probably in this region."

"Wow, sounds a little cocky to me," he teased.

"Maybe," she said, "but true. Plus, I would get paid way more, I would get amazing hours, and it'd give me a lot more time at home when I wasn't knee-deep in paperwork."

"I can't argue with that," he said, "Please continue."

"Number three: Buy a house. I know you're going to ask anyway, so I'm just going to say. I want to buy a house so that I have somewhere to go when I need to go home. I like my apartment, but that's all it will ever be. I want a home. I want to have Christmas dinner in my glorious dining room, and have Superbowl parties in my living room. I really want to be settled."

He nodded his approval, not having anything to add, as she continued.

"Number two: Start a family. It's obvious that I want to be a mom. I'm ready to go whenever, but that's not what I mean. Yes, someday, I want to have kids. I learned through this whole thing though, families aren't always the typical two parents and a few kids. Families are the sister that takes you into her house when you have a crappy apartment, and the people who notice when you're having a sucky day at work, and the best friend who lets you wake him up at three to help you do trivial things. Families are the people we love, and who love us, even when the world gives us every reason not to. Family is the person who would die for you, because they love you so much that being in the world without you is worse than death."

She let a tear escape and fall down her cheek and he smiled internally. He had heard the stories many times. Meredith Grey telling Gary Clarke to shoot her, Owen Hunt getting shot so Christina Yang could operate on Derek Shepherd, but neither of those stories struck him as hard as Callie and Arizona's. Meredith and Owen were willing to die for the people they loved, yes. But something about their sacrifices were expected. It's easy to protect your husband. Standing between a gunman and the woman you love, when you're unsure that she even likes you as a human, that's something else.

"Are you ok to go on?" he asked, as they both regained composure.

"Even though the kids thing isn't as big a deal to me now as I thought it was, I'd still love to have a little girl. I want a perfect little girl, with amazingly blue eyes and an incredible smile. She'd be beautiful enough to mask her naughty streak, and funny enough to make me forget to be mad at her for getting her clothes all dirty or playing too roughly. I'd love to give my heart to a girl like that. I'd love for Arizona to love her just as much. Have you ever heard of such a thing?"

He smiled widely, "Believe it or not, I have," he said, "Do I need to guess number one?"

"Number one: Arizona."

"Why is Arizona your number one?" He asked, though he knew she had been number one before Callie had said.

"Arizona is my number one because without her, 2-5 don't even matter. Without her, nothing matters."

-.-

I just realized that what I thought was double spacing was really 1.5 spacing. No wonder the formatting never matched! Hope you all enjoyed the chapter!


	6. Chapter 6

**Greetings readers! I can't believe I let it go so long without an update. Many apologies. This is the final chapter, so I feel kind of bad about not just finishing it a lot sooner. Despite all that, I hope this story has been worth your while, worth the wait, and all around enjoyable. Reviews are wonderful, but I've learned not to be too offended by the lack of them, so if you'd like to review, please do, and if not, that's all right as well. Thanks for sticking it out so long, and I hope this is all you've needed to be happy. For those of you who miss me often, I am in the middle of writing a Glee/Grey's crossover that you can find by clicking my name (btw, I have changed it). It's called "This is for Keeps" and it is (going to be) a Brittana/Calzona fic. If you're into that, I suggest you check it out, but if you don't, that's fine too. Anyway, please enjoy this chapter and feel free to message me about whether or not you'd like to see a sequel or have any requests.**

**xXxXx**

The time had gone by quickly enough, all things considered. Soon, Andrew Perkins had gone, leaving Teddy and those he couldn't quite save in his wake. Still, the doctors seemed to move on in the best ways they could. No matter the amount of progress already made, more was possible, though only time and patience, neither of which was as readily available as it had previously seemed, was the only cure.

It had been nearly six months since the day that their lives had been forever changed. Six months of pain and sorrow; self-discovery and healing. Six months of Arizona and her Calliope, learning to live as a couple rather than two selfish individuals. At least, that was their goal.

Arizona had learned to bend quite a bit in the past six months. Things that would bother the old Arizona were brushed off and forgiven. No matter the extent of her personal growth, however, there was still something that bothered Arizona to the core. It was unreasonable, irrational, foolish. She told herself that each and every time the thought occurred. Still, it continued to reappear in her mind.

"Really, there's no reason why you shouldn't," she said to her best friend.

"I can think of several reasons," the cardio attending replied.

"See! I can't! I can think of zero reasons as to why my best friend shouldn't hook up with my girlfriend's best friend! Yes, I know he is an awful manwhore; he cheated on you! But I can't make that little voice in my head shut up and the only thought, the only idea that makes it go away just the littlest bit is the thought of you keeping him away!"

"Arizona, this is not okay."

"I know that! Still, I can't help it. You want to know how I reasoned this last night? I decided that if he hurt you, you wouldn't care because you only want the sex. Then I decided that if you two worked out, that would be even better, because then Callie and I could have our best friends out with us at the same time."

"Arizona," her friend said shaking her head in disbelief, "I think you're insane."

"Who's insane?" Bailey asked as she set her tray on the table with the two attendings.

"I am," Arizona said, "because Mark Sloan is driving me crazy. Not the funny aunt crazy, the masked murderer in the horror franchise crazy."

"Oh Lord," Bailey said, "I am not about to be a part of this."

"At least she doesn't want you to date him," Teddy said.

"Oh my gosh! Bailey, you're still single right?" Arizona excitedly asked.

"Date him?" Bailey asked, "Girl you must be out of your mind if you think I'm about to do that. Not for you. We are not good enough friends for me to do that for you," she said as she took a drink, cautiously eying the now frantic blonde.

When Bailey saw someone who could salvage the situation enter the door across the cafeteria, she made her move,

"Hey Torres!" she called. Half of the hospital staff turned and looked at her as though she was the crazy one for yelling across the room.

"Don't any of you look at me like that. You all can go ahead and mind your businesses. What, like you haven't ever had a friend you had to call to across a room? That's what I thought, cause we all know Dr. Bailey can do whatever Dr. Bailey wants to do!" She said as she sat back down, looking a her lunch companions who in turn were looking at her as though she had grown a third eye.

"What?"

"I think crazy is going around," Teddy said as the other women agreed.

"What the hell was that Bailey?" Callie asked as she approached the table.

"I just wanted to get your attention. For various reasons," she said, finally feeling embarrassed.

"And those are?"

"Not important!" Arizona interjected. Her companions decided to let the issue rest and they quickly began to discuss other topics of interest. Arizona reasoned that she'd figure out what to do about Mark, eventually.

xXxX

The chief announced that he would be hearing proposals for a new research, one that was worth a one million dollar grant. If there was one thing Callie needed, it was an all-out win. She needed to destroy her opponents in the most secretive way possible so that even they wouldn't know what she was doing until it was too late to recover. She knew she should feel bad about tricking her colleagues into defeat, but she rationalized that she would do something nice for them after she won the grant because, after all, she was totally going to win. Perhaps it should have bothered her to entertain the thoughts she currently worked over, but she knew it was for her win. She sat on the couch, nodding and speaking at the appropriate moments, all the while plotting against the one person who could truly defeat her.

"…so I told Teddy about it and she just said that if I was over it, I should be over it and I shouldn't worry. I just get so frustrated when it happens. I have been working on it, I really have, but sometimes when the Chief tells me not to do something or that I should do something I have to cry."

"Mmhmm," Callie said, holding Arizona's hand. She knew it was devious, but it was her only option, "Crying is okay. It's not like anyone would think you were a giant baby for crying about stuff the Chief says. It's not childish at all."

"Really?"

"Yeah! What kind of a child would roll around on wheelie sneakers and hand out stickers all day? It takes a completely capable adult for that."

"Are you mocking me, Calliope?"

"What? No! No, I'm not mocking you at all! I mean it's your party, cry if you want to! Isn't that what all you sorority girls do anyway?"

"I see what you're doing, Calliope, and I don't like it. I don't like it at all. You're using my naturally child-like world approach and college sorority status against me so that you can win the grant! Well, all I have to say to you is that you better try harder than that because it is on. It is so on. You may have grown up privileged and been able to have whatever you wanted, but I grew up on Marine bases around the world with the name Arizona. I can fight you, Calliope, and I will win. I know your weaknesses just as well as you know mine."

"Is that so?" Callie asked defiantly.

"It is!" Arizona countered as tears began to brim her eyes.

"Arizona, please don't cry," Callie asked, dropping her passive-aggression at the sight of her beloved.

"I'm going to cry, Calliope," Arizona said, "and you're going to comfort me, but don't you dare think this means that I quit!"

Callie wrapped the blonde up in a tight embrace and Arizona clung and sobbed. The competition might have been on at work, Callie decided, but at home, she and Arizona shouldn't go head to head.

xXxXx

"Owen," Callie said angrily as she opened her apartment door.

"Let it go," the blonde behind her said as she sorted the mail.

"Why should I? I had a plan. It was a solid plan."

"It was a terrible plan," Arizona told her, "half of the staff informed me that you made their lists."

Callie grunted some incoherent things and Arizona just smiled and shook her head. The mail was mostly junk; some credit card offers and store magazines. One letter, though, addressed to Dr. Arizona Robbins, poked out from the rest.

Arizona opened the letter, which had no return address but a crest that she thought she may have seen before, suspiciously, wondering if perhaps Callie had sent something to psych her out before they had called a truce. As she scanned it though, she saw words like 'pleased to inform' and 'achievements inspired' and 'congratulations'.

"Oh my gosh," she said in shock.

"Hmm? What?"

"I won. I won the grant."

"No, Arizona, you told the Chief you wanted to hit me. He gave you a pamphlet on domestic abuse," Callie said.

"You don't understand," she said, "not that grant. The Carter-Madison."

"You won the Carter-Madison?" Callie asked excitedly, jumping up from her chair and rushing around to the back of Arizona, so she could see the letter.

"I won the Carter-Madison."

"Arizona, this is amazing! I'm so proud of you! When did you apply, I didn't even know you applied, why do you look so less than thrilled?"

"I applied over two years ago, before I made it to Seattle even. I didn't tell you I applied cause I forgot about it. I thought it must not have been good enough," she said, still shocked and displeased.

"But you did it! You won, this is a good thing!"

"No, it isn't Callie!" she barked, "It isn't a good thing because when I applied for the grant I wasn't in love with anybody so it didn't matter to me if I had to pick up and leave or not! It seemed like a really good idea, to go to Africa and help the kids there that nobody else would! But now, I am in love, with you, and I don't want to go to Africa because I don't want to have to say goodbye to you again."

"Africa?" Was all Callie could say.

"Africa. I won the Carter-Madison grant to go work in Africa."

"We'll figure this out," Callie said, "we'll make it out of this. We'll be alright."

Arizona couldn't process. Her mind just kept reeling, repeating the same thing over again and again. Before, she would have been happy. She would have been so excited to go. Now, her mind and body felt heavy, as though gravity was holding her down with twenty times the usual force. She couldn't wrap her head around it, she couldn't feel reality any longer. Even as she felt Callie's arms take hold of her and hug her closely, she couldn't feel. Her body reacted violently, shaking and sobbing, as it had only once before, when she had lost him so long ago.

"I won the Carter-Madison," she repeated until her voice gave out. She was ready to fight for her and Callie, and she was certain that Callie was willing to fight for her.

"I won the Carter-Madison," she rasped out a final time. She couldn't understand why she was so upset. She couldn't understand why her victory felt so much like a loss.


End file.
